Nathan Kennedy

5 stars in the sky

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None in my heart.


I sit there in the corner of this farm campsite in the middle of nowhere Gloucestershire. I sit around a table with a pack of cheese twist sitting next to the half eaten Houmas. I conehere every year with my family and some friends. It is a nice time to relax and take a step back for just a few days. I take a sip of my cider from my insulate cup, my mum put like a sticker on it with my name so we would never get the confused.

My family and the friends around me had been talking a camping trip we had been on last year. I was mostly zoned out of the conversation and looked up to the stars. I spotted the big dipper fairly quickly and look out at the rest of the expansive stars. I look up there for a while watching them sit there.

I hear someone making a fuss by the our small barbeque. It has melted through the layer of cardboard we had put under it and was killing the grass. The girl next to me, Emily, gets up and offers to find some other kind of base. I offer to join her in her hunt.

I'd known her for a few years, she had short black hair brushed behind her back. She wore shorts but not like really short shorts ye know. We spoke for a bit about a party that had been going on in the campsite. 

"Where are we even going" she asked.
"I thought we were going to like that scrapyard we had walked past earlier"
"Yeah but isnt that like reallly far away"
"I dont know i thought we were just walking till we found something"
"Maybe we should go back then see if there was anything by the bins"
"Yeah yeah thats cool."

We continued to talk about friends we knew from our mutual friend group cracking jokes about them. We found a few bricks just laying around. As we walked towards the light of our campsite that guided our way i looked back at the stars I had been gazing at before. In the distance just in the sky above some apple trees i can see a small group of stars that hadn't been present before.


There were 5 of them. 4 of them were in a square formation with one sitting under the bottom left corner. 

They danced around each other spiralling in and out.

"Hey are you okay?" Emily asked

"yeah yeah I was just looking at the stars...." I trailed off.

The stars danced up and down in all direction, They got brighter and dimmer and smaller and bigger. My eyes were fixated on them. I dropped the bricks to the side of my ankles.

Emily came up to me and tried to shake me into sense.
"Hey... hey" 

I closed my eyes and when I opened them she was gone.

I was in a field. A field with no hedges. A world with no voices.

Pure silence. Pure bliss.

I stood in the cold mist of the evening and watched the stars dance into all kinds of shapes and concepts. I saw the ones I loved. I saw the ones I hated. The stars made me feel; love, hate, bliss, pain, lust, envy, and every emotion i have ever rushes past me like a sharp cold wind. 

My eyes water but I cannot stop watching the pure..... pure



I look around and I'm back in my camping chair. Everything the same yet everything so so different. 


I love you

I am here to launder money

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